Recently I had put too much pressure on myself. Trying to do everything I can to be the best mother, to take care of a home, to taking care of my health, to working, to starting a business, to wanting to make this the best Christmas ever and start all new traditions with our babies.
I had to try to do more and by doing more I have done less and less because, BURNOUT!
I ended up with migraines which lasted for days unable to complete my normal tasks let alone going to the above and beyond standard I set for myself. I FUCKED UP my thyroid medication, like more than I ever have before in my life, which spun me into an awful state of hypothyroidism. This in no doubt contributed to the migraines since my body is so sensitive to everything.
Once again pissed off and depressed that I couldn’t do my workouts, which are already basically impossible to fit; I was starting to feel as if all of these goals I set for myself would never get accomplished.
In this terrible mindset - I decided the best thing to do would be to write. I figured once I started to write my guides would work through me. If I listened I knew they would give me the message I needed to get out of this crazy sucko mindset of feeling overwhelmed and depressed [and then feeling guilty for having those feelings].
As I was writing I knew my first step was that I had to acknowledge that I was feeling this way! To feel guilty over it wasn’t going to get me anywhere. I had to truly sit with my feelings. So I kept writing. I cried, I allowed myself to truly feel where I was.
I accepted that my list of “To Do’s” was long. But I also had to prioritize; what on that list had to be done RIGHT NOW. Is there anything on that list that would take away this overwhelmed guilty feeling.
With tears, but eyes shut. I asked myself, what do I NEED to do?
The Word that came to me from my higher self was ENJOY.
I of course went into ego mode and said that is too simple.
But it wasn’t. That is what I needed to do. Just enjoy
I had to sit for a moment with all of the BS that my mind was throwing at me;
“But I can’t enjoy if I want to lose weight”,
“I can’t enjoy if I have too many bills to pay”,
“I can’t enjoy because I should spend time working on my coaching (website, trainings, etc.) instead”.
The list went on and on...
My heart knew better.
Just ENJOY this, my absolute favorite time of the year. To enjoy and appreciate all that I was thankful for during this extremely crazy year.
Let that BS list go.
By letting it go did not mean that I couldn’t schedule time to do a work out. It didn’t mean I would eat ONLY shitty food for those next three weeks, it did not mean that I would not work on anything related to my business goals. It just meant I won’t obsess and feel like crap about it when I don’t do it.
Instead- Just Enjoy. Be in the moment and go with what my heart was guiding me to for the remainder of the year.
I had to remind myself that I didn’t last year. Last year I was trying to make it through my 30th Birthday and Christmas without vomiting or falling asleep from the pregnancy. It was not fun and I didn’t get to enjoy it.
There was SO much to be thankful for this year. There was SO much to enjoy.
Once I really let it sink in to just ENJOY (key word here JOY!) everything else started to come together. I was feeling happier, more centered and present. Because really that is where we should all be - truly present in each moment.
Because I did this. Because I listened to my heart and I (for the most part) stayed in the present moment. I ended up having the most amazing time with my boys and fiancé.
I finished this year out fucken strong and in the right mindset to move forward with all of the other intentions I set for myself.
I committed to having a true plan to make the changes to my health which has been so needed after the intense pregnancy.
I committed to a schedule and routine for my coaching.
I committed to being able to ENJOY my family when I am with them and to not get lost in my head about other things.
My message to you after this longish story…
It is so easy to get caught up in the bullshit in your head. But always remember there is a higher force working for you and guiding you. When you can quiet your mind and let the inner voice come through you are given all of the answers.
Here are the major takeaways for the so the next time you find yourself feeling crazy overwhelemd like I was you can use these steps to recenter and focus!
Step 1: Acknowledge how you are actually feeling
Step 2: LET THOSE FEELINGS OUT! Cry, Journal, Dance, Scream- whatever you need to, in order to move ahead
Step 3: Listen for the message your HEART gives you
Step 4: the most important step- LISTEN TO IT! Follow it!